I want to share a story today from a couple years ago that I still think about all the time. It’s a story about learning to cultivate a fierce warrior energy – and standing up to bullies. I hope it inspires you to find inspiration for mindset shifts when you need it!
An anecdote about fierce warrior energy
A while back, there was this guy at my gym who was super disrespectful. Every day, he clogged up the bench in the treadmill zone with tote bags and coats and other clothing; he didn’t want to use the lockers the gym provides. But I needed that bench. It used to be that when I would work out, I would sometimes get dizzy or wobbly and need to sit for a spell. So a clogged bench was a problem for me and my chronic health issues.
I tried asking him nicely. The conversation devolved quickly, with him raising his voice and spouting excuses galore, including that he had been a gym patron for 25 years. At one point, he reached for my arm to grab me. I said, “Don’t touch me!” and he looked me up and down and sneered, “Oh don’t worry, I wasn’t planning on it” and walked away.
So he was:
- entitled
- rude
- disrespectful
- a weenie
I started taking his belongings and placing them under the bench when I worked out in that area. I’ve gotta tell you, the first time I did it, my heart rate exploded. I experienced abuse when I was a child, and I still struggle with feeling afraid when men raise their voice at me.
My inner child was freaked out
Inside, I know I am very powerful, and I can handle almost anything that comes my way. But when men raise their voice to me, I sometimes turn into an anxious 11-year-old version of myself: terrified, wanting to soothe everyone, seeking to calm down the situation. Even taking the non-confrontational action of moving his stuff so I could use the bench felt very wrong to that inner child.
But I continued to move this guy’s stuff, and slowly I became less and less triggered by it. As I drove to the gym one day with my husband, Joe, I told him I’d been experiencing anxiety and that I’d been looking for a way to think about the situation differently.
Joe felt unequivocally that I was in the right, and wanted me to prepare myself mentally to speak to the dude the next time I saw him. Joe suggested I try cultivating a fierce warrior identity, specifically: Shukongojin.
This statue of Shukongojin is part of the Art Institute of Chicago’s Arts of Asia permanent collection. It was created in Japan sometime between 1199 and 1139.
Learning about fierce warrior energy at the museum
Whenever we visit the Art Institute of Chicago, we enjoy seeing their Shukongojin. Crafted sometime in the Kamakura Period in Japan many hundreds of years ago, Shukongojin is known as the Thunderbolt Deity. “This fierce protector of the Law of Buddhism brandishes a vajra that symbolizes the power of wisdom to penetrate ignorance and destroy evil,” according to the item’s listing.
He’s a total badass, right?! Don’t mess with Shukongojin!
As a Buddhist, Shukongojin feels vital to me. Most of the time, I cultivate a peaceful, loving energy. But I’m human and sometimes I need fierceness, too!
Creative resilience includes making big mindset shifts
A big aspect of creative resilience in my life is rethinking identity. We don’t have to stay trapped in our past; we don’t have to be crippled by our past abuse and negative experiences, or by the bad reflexes they taught us. We truly can work to identify when the past shows up and approach it in new and fresh ways. We are able to make meaningful mindset shifts.
Like envisioning myself as a fierce protector! Brandishing wisdom! All your thunderbolts be mine!
I dropped Joe off at work that day and headed to the gym. As usual, it was time for a bench clearing so I could sit. This time, I felt no anxiety. Instead I found myself giggling at how silly it was to envision my alter ego, Shukongojin, in gym clothes. I texted Joe:
It may seem silly sometimes, but when we try to imagine ourselves with fresh identities…when we allow ourselves to take on different personas…when we let ourselves play a bit, and not take it too seriously…it changes us. It makes us stronger. It helps us face things that were once scary, and bounce back.
An exercise to practice cultivating new energy
Does this sound appealing to you? I’ve got a simple exercise you can try today to cultivate fierce warrior energy (or any energy you need). It goes like this:
Find a quiet place to sit uninterrupted for 10 minutes, and put your device in Do Not Disturb mode.
Close your eyes; if that’s uncomfortable, sit with your eyes unfocused on a blank wall, or let yourself stare into nature.
Imagine a fierce warrior – anyone/anything you believe has the strength to stand up to the forces that are beating you down. It could be a real entity from history, or someone/something completely made up.
Visualize this entity sitting down across from you to have a conversation.
Ask them anything you wish. “How’d you get so tough?” or “What do you do when you feel scared?” or “What can you teach me?”
Listen to what they want to share. Don’t judge the response – take it in. Maybe it’s silly, or difficult, or so simple it seems like it won’t work. Just let it sink in.
Ask clarifying questions to dig deeper into their process, and how you might integrate it into your process.
When you’re finished, thank the entity for their help and encourage them to come back to visit you anytime.
Open your eyes and write down the wisdom they shared, and how you plan to integrate it into your daily life.
You can repeat this exercise over and over… and you might need to in order to integrate the knowledge in a way that makes it easier for you to access day-to-day. You can invite Shukongojin (or your fierce warrior of choice) to visit you all the time!
With time, you’ll be able to generate a mindset shift that feels natural. Now I feel Shukongojin with me every time I go to the gym – and I have no problem standing up for accessibility and respect in that space.
How will you cultivate fierce warrior energy?
My challenge to you, friend: What kind of warrior will you be today? What fierce identity will you play with? Let me know in the comments!
